It was a normal Saturday afternoon trip to SCHEELS with the family.
My husband, who loves to wander through the various sections, mentioned he’d like to start at the golf area upstairs.
Perfect, I thought, knowing our daughter loves to ride the escalator. When we got to the top, she politely asked if we could go again. I agreed, saying we could go up and down three times, but then would have to join her father.
“YAY!” she exclaimed in her sweet, three-year-old tone.
So there we were: down, up, down, up, down.
As we went up each time, I did my best to remind her how many rides we had left. And while I knew she understood what I was saying, I had a feeling that it wasn’t going to be pretty once we were done.
I was right.
The second we got off the escalator, just out of the way of the shoppers behind us, the meltdown ensued.
Crying, screaming, hitting — the whole nine yards.
Holding Boundaries
In our home, we’ve worked really hard to set boundaries with our toddler. We explain the situation up front while providing age-appropriate and understandable reasoning.
Sometimes the result is a calm toddler who understands and listens when it’s time to put a toy away or leave the park.
And other times, it’s more difficult.
At home, it’s a bit more comfortable (though not easier by any means) to handle the meltdown. We can take the time to go back and forth, talking calmly and helping our daughter bring her emotional reaction down.
In public spaces, however, it can be easier to want to ‘give in’ with others in close proximity. We’re more mindful of the noise and try not to make others feel uncomfortable.
Pushing Through the Meltdown
We’re definitely not perfect as parents (far from it) but for whatever reason that day, I decided I was holding my ground and even the longest, most intense meltdown wasn’t going to win.
I helped my daughter, kicking and screaming, to a space out of the way from other customers. Remaining calm, I tried to explain to her my reasoning. She continually asked to go back down the escalator, completely fixated on that activity.
I was starting to sweat, feeling wandering eyes on me and my daughter as we navigated through her emotions. After what seemed like five very long treadmill-type minutes, we came to an understanding. We were both calm and ready to find her dad.
But before I could get too far, an older gentleman came up to me and simply said, “Thank you for having patience.”
Unexpected Kindness
His words stopped me dead in my tracks. And unfortunately, he didn’t give me much time to respond before heading back downstairs.
It was a simple statement, and I later reflected on why it had such a profound impact.
Maybe it was because I assumed everyone in the entire store wanted the two of us to leave.
Could it have been the gentleman’s gender and age, considering he’s likely seen a lot of life and possibly experienced similar situations as a dad or grandpa?
Or, maybe it was the fact that a random stranger had acknowledged my role as a parent, in a really challenging moment, in a way that I’ve never experienced before.
The more I thought about it, the more the reason behind the gesture didn’t matter. But what did was the simple, yet so meaningful statement, “Thank you for having patience.”
Why?
Because we probably all need that gentle reminder to have a little more patience.
With ourselves, our kids, co-workers, sales associates, waitresses, and heck, even the stranger taking their time in Costco at 10:00 a.m. on a busy Saturday morning.
We live in such a fast world that it’s way too easy to become impatient leading to rudeness, resentment, and anger.
Next time you witness a loved one (or even a stranger) practicing patience in whatever situation they may find themselves in, thank them.
You’ll never know how much a kind word will affect them!
